Here We Go..Again.

So, this week is an incredibly big week. Jake goes to the heart doctor Tuesday. You know how I feel about that. Just pray. I've been keeping my mind off of it by cleaning. I've not only cleaned out closets... I've painted them. I've had Dave helping me fix little things around here that bugged me for years. It's my own way of having control. Jake's heart... I can't fix that.

Control of that is not mine.

You know, I've written so many times about Jake's heart. So many times I've said... I have peace. I have trust. I know who is in control. It's all so true. But also know... it's a constant struggle. It's a daily choice of putting your mind in the right place. And yes, my mind wanders into scenarios that are not good. But I make myself hit the brakes... and get my mind back on the right path.

I'm not a girl who is always OK. There are days where I'll be driving and fear hits. I'll look up and say out loud.. Father I'm scared. You know what I hear him say? "Stay with me. I've got it. " And he does. I mean just look at what he's already given me. I'm one lucky girl.